Creating Massive Change: How to Get Out of Our Own Way

Has it ever occurred to you that maybe your life isn’t changing because you’re holding yourself back but don’t know it?

Like maybe there’s something in your conditioning or a subconscious belief that’s preventing you from doing something that could bring you the change you seek?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot since I took Nadia Colburn’s five-day mindful writing challenge because one of the prompts elicited a profound insight about why I’ve struggled to create the change I want most in life.

Part of the prompt was “Don’t go off somewhere else,” and after a brief meditation at …

Has it ever occurred to you that maybe your life isn’t changing because you’re holding yourself back but don’t know it?

Like maybe there’s something in your conditioning or a subconscious belief that’s preventing you from doing something that could bring you the change you seek?

I’ve been thinking about this a lot since I took Nadia Colburn’s five-day mindful writing challenge because one of the prompts elicited a profound insight about why I’ve struggled to create the change I want most in life.

Part of the prompt was “Don’t go off somewhere else,” and after a brief meditation at the start of the challenge that gave me a deep sense of calm and clarity, the following insight came to me: 

Roots and wings—that’s what I’ve always wanted. And I always thought roots meant my home, my family of origin. Life away from them was wings. But I’ve spent my whole adult life feeling like I’ve had one foot out the door because I haven’t allowed myself to have roots and wings at the same time. And that’s what I really want. To allow myself to be fully where I am. To believe it’s safe to be where I am. It’s not wrong to be where I am. I’m not wrong, wherever I am.

This was a big aha moment for me because it gave me further insight into something I’ve been reflecting on lately: that in all my moves—fifteen of them within twenty years—I never allowed myself to really settle in. To commit to things. To become part of a community.

This isn’t to say I